actually, i kinda gave up on the idea of getting a new blog.
my life is boring and hence nothing to be posted. i thought of just letting the blog die.
somehow or another, i feel that i am selfish and over protective of my youngest brother. Its as if like i make damn sure that no one hurts him otherwise i will be involved. I didnt realized he cut his wrist. I mean.. over a relationship you do that? its NOT worth it. Fuck relationship ok.
No matter how i try to look at it, its never worth to start one until... that day really comes. Failed relationship and all.. DAMMIT, why does everyone have to get hurt always.
I dont want my brother to end up like how i was before, cause its not worth to be like me. All that hate bottled up, all the sadness kept within.. sometimes, its just hard to talk about your own problems. I am glad that he can speak up his problems to his siblings. At least, people hear his problems. everytime when you try to love somebody, its always double the sadness in return.. whats the worth of it?
During this long holiday, i think i managed.. to figure whats wrong with me :)... at least, i tonned down a little. I am glad that the picnic i organised with the help of people in my class, Its sucessful. Although i was kinda bored... wasnt in the crappy/high mood these days. I am starting to worry, like worry loads.. you know... school's starting, project grouping and all that. I really hope things dont go the opposite way this time. Whats more worrying is that there's presentation and all.. Sigh.. my worst fears always haunt me.. T.T help..
dreamer's world.. dreamer's music..
13:49
